Hello, My name is.. (49)

Dear Diary,

I sat in my room for an hour, Meera's image still stuck in my mind, well not only Meera alone, but Meera and S3ood together. He seems to be still in love with her, but she's married. Is she in love with him? She named her son S3ood, I assume that she named him after S3ood, my S3ood.

Is he really my S3ood?

I can't say that. He has been treating me like a sister from the beginning, he never gave me reason to doubt that he thinks of me as a sister. Then why do I feel this way? Why do I feel that he's mine?

I decided that I shouldn't waste my time pining after someone I will never get. Even with Meera out of the picture, S3ood would never be interested in me. I have to move on, I owe it to myself. There must be someone out there for me, there's one for everyone right?

But is it easy to get over the feelings I have for him? Well, I got over Ahmed pretty quickly didn't I? I thought I was in love with him, but I moved on fine, so I could do it again. Move on. Except with Ahmed I didn't feel as strongly, I loved the rush, the attention but I also felt uneasy. With S3ood it didn't happen all of a sudden, I got to know him first, I feel comfortable around him.

Well, my mind is set. I have to get over him, we're friends and nothing more.

I left my room to sit in the living room and watch TV. Fa6oom was not here yet, so I made a bowl of microwave popcorn and sat watching old episodes of Scrubs and giggling along with the characters. An hour later Fa6oom and 3abdallah walked into the living room,
"Hello baby sis"
"Hiii" I greeted them with a grin,
"Ha you had a good day shopping?"
"I had a great day!"
"What did you buy?"
"Oooh I bought so much stuff! But I left it with S3ood" I just remembered that since I rushed away, all my shopping was still with him,
"Hahah no I meant what did you get my mother?" asked 3abdallah,
"Shh Nooro, don't tell him! You're cheating!" she said hitting him lightly on the arm,
"It's not a competition!" he answered laughing,
"I know bs int ma re'6ait tgool what you got, so don't ask what he got!"
"Well, I don't know anyway" I said shrugging my shoulders and turning back to the TV, suddenly my mood switched, and I didn't know why.
"Noor are you ok?" said Fa6ma sitting down next to me,
"E I'm fine why?" I replied, popping pop corn into my mouth,
"Madry mara wa7da you went quiet"
"Umm.. Noor did you see anyone when you were shopping?" asked 3abdallah,
"Yeah chefna wayed nas,"
"La I meant.. hmm.. nevermind forget it.. Fa6ma ta3aly I want to show you something up stairs"
"Tawna yayeen min fog, what will you show me?"
"Inty ta3aly!" he said grabbing her from her arm and leaving the flat.

Wonder what he wants to talk to her about? Obviously he wanted to say something but didn't want to say it infront of me. Bet it's about Meera.. and S3ood.

Well.. I'm bound to find out later.

Until next time..