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Hello, My name is.. (22)

Dear Diary,
I need to breathe, I don't know what just happened. I got into a huge fight with Ahmed and I don't think he will ever talk to me again, well after what he said maybe I don't want to talk to him either.
Let me start from the begining.
This morning I got a call from my cousin. My cousin and I aren't really close, ya3ny we hang out o chethy bs 3adi, I wouldn't expect her to call me in Doha let alone call me when I'm in London, but she was very close to my sister since they're both the same age and went to school together. I'd have forgotton my father's weird phone call that happened a few days ago, or at least tried to put it in the back of my mind, but my cousin's call was related.
"Hala Sha3oool, sha5barech?"
"Not good, I'm sorry to call you and freak you out wallah bs this is important"
"What? What's going on?"
"Well I don't know how to start this 9ara7a, this is very weird"
"Sha3ool gooly 5ara3teeny? Fa6oom i5ty feha shay?" Well this was the only thing that made sense ya3ny Fa6ma was close to her.
"Weeeeeell.. feeha o ma feeha"
"Shlon? Lat5ar3eeny just say it!"
"Ubooch kalemach mn youmain?"
"Yeeees.. what the hell was that about?" I tried to laugh to lighten the mood but the only thing that came out was a high pitched squeel. Shit this must be serious.
"Ma a3arf shagool lech. You know 3azeez ukhooy has a girlfriend right?"
"Yeah so? They've been together for 8 years, since high school. Even your mum knows"
"Yes and my mum loves her. So 3azeez decided to marry her.."
"Ohhhh mabroook.. 5ara3teeny fakart shay serious! When's the wedding?"
"Well.. there's no wedding.. at least not to her. My dad found out she's not Qatari, and this is something the family apparently will not accept, so.."
"Yeah.. well teshaweraw ili5wan.. ubooy o ubooch.. and they decided that 3azeez should marry Fa6oom"
"WHAT? That's crazy!!! He's like her brother!!" 3azeez is Mesha3el's twin so they both kind of grew up with Fa6oom like brothers and sisters. This is extremely weird, even for my family.
"I know.."
"What's Fa6oom gonna do? Miskeena.." I was never close with my sister, but still there's this bond you have with your siblings no matter what..
"Noor it's no longer Fa6oom's problem"
"What do you mean?"
"It's yours.."
"Huh? You just said.." wait wait wait.. I'm getting confused.
"Yes. When your father told Fa6ma she went on a hunger strike, for two weeks. Well not really, the maid sneaked in food for her at night but your parents didn't know, and well it worked. Your father convinced mine that you would be more suitable for 3azeez"
"WHAT? and what am I? Just a sheep they're taking to slaughter?"
"I'm sorry Nooro. Fa6oom wanted to call you but your father took her phone and laptop and everything. She wrote me a note and sent it with a driver so I can call you. That's why he called you and asked you to come"
"I'm in shock. How can my EDUCATED father and uncle think like this?"
"I don't know wallah, my mum can't stop crying. Tgool lah 7aram 3alaik te'6lem weldek o bint u5ook, bs he won't listen. He doesn't want the family business to go 3end '3areeb."
"So the business is worth more to them than us?"
"Yeah, what did you think?"
"Yeah. What can I do now?"
"I don't know, Fa6oom says you'll figure it out."
"How? I'm sure my mum agrees with them"
"Unfortunately yes"
"Oh God, poor 3azeez.. poor me"
"I know.."
Half an hour of discussion later we reached no where, I didn't know what to do so I called Ahmed.
I decided that I was over reacting with the whole song issue, I mean it could be innocent and he was just listening to a song he likes, ya3ny ma feeha shay and I needed his company, I needed his big strong arms to reassure me that everything is ok, even if I know it's not.Of course I couldn't tell him, he'd never understand. Although his father died when he was a kid, he comes from a very caring and loving family, his uncles ma 5aloh y7es ina yeteem and therefore he's very sheltered.
Since he was feeling better I decided to treat him to a Qatari machboos dish, so I slaved over the stove for over an hour cooking for him while he watched TV, I served the food and we ate, well I did, he couldn't since it was too spicy for him. After that we sat down to watch a movie, just as I was snuggling into his arms my phone rang.
My dear father is calling.
"Na3am yubba"
"3abdel3azeez weld 3amech 56ebach o ana o umech wafagna, lama terje3een ildo7a bet9eer 5o6obtech. Umech tgool lech roo7y dawreelech thyab 7ag il7afla o ana bokra ba7awel lech ilfloos.."
"O bas 5ala9.. qararto bedaly? Ya3ny ana maly raay fe 7ayaty?" I can't believe he's that arrogant! He thinks I will just take his orders?
"LA! Ana mub mwafga, o lain yebto ilshai5 bagool ana mub mwafga o bagool ina uhwa ba3ad ma yabeeny o in7na ma'39oobeen 3ala ba3a'6 bs ubooy o 3ammy ma yabooon flooshum troo7 b3eed!"
"LAA ya3ny LAAA" I was yelling and Ahmed was staring at me, frowning and squeezing my arm, "Laaaa laaaa laaa laaaaa!!! Lain meta beteg3edoon tel3eboon feena? 3omerkum ma fakarto feena, dayman a5er hamkum! Int ma hamek ila ilshareka o ilmaktab!!"
"O an 7ag meen ashte'3el?" he yelled back, I couldn't believe I was yelling at my father but enough is enough.
"7ag rooo7ek!!!"
"Ana ashte'3el 3alashankum! 3ashan ma aga9er 3alaikum fe shay!!"
"LA int mga9er 3alaina fe aham shay! Int ma 3omrek se2altna shlonkum! Kel ma gelna shay 3a6aitna floos, it's not everything in the world!"
"NOOOR shga3da tgooleeen!!! Shlon tkalmeen ubooch chethy!"
"Int shlon tbee3 bentek? Money is the most important thing for you!"
"NOOR ana asawy ilfloos 3ashankum!! ya3ny ana lain met ba5eth ilfloos ma3ay?"
"MAYBE, you might do that just to piss us off!!"
And he hung up.
I sat on the sofa in shock, not believing that I yelled at my father. Me, the polite quiet one, the one who always looked down and nodded consent everytime her father said something. I yelled at him.
I looked up at Ahmed with tears in my eyes expecting him to comfort me, to pull me in his arms, but he just stared at me with a look in his eyes..
He looked disgusted.
"Ahmed" I whispered finally.
"Inty shlon tkalmeen ubooch b'hal 6areeqa?"
"Shlon tgoleen lah halkalam?"
"Ahmed did you hear what he's trying to do?"
"Yes, and he's your father and he knows best. No matter what he does ma tkalmeena chethy"
"Are you serious!!!?"
"Lat9ar5eeen 3alay!! ana many yahel t5ar3eeny be9ra5ech! Inty '3al6ana! Mafy bint nas tkalem ubooha b'hal 6areeqa!"
"Ahmed!!! I knew you wouldn't understand! You come from a completely different background! Ahmed life is not white, pink and fluffy! I COME FROM A SHITTY BROKEN WORLD! A world that you know NOTHING about, and will never understand!"
"Aaaah.. but S3ood will.. His parents are divorced, akeed beyefhemech akthar.. ana ma anfe3ech because I'm a normal person and that's not good enough for you!"
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!! My father is trying to marry me off to my cousin in a month's time and your thinking of a guy I saw TWICE! Ahmed i6la3 bara.. I6LA3 BARA I CAN'T SEE YOUR FACE!!!"
And he slammed the door.
Please wake me up from this nightmare.
Until next time..