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Hello, My name is.. (46)


Dear Diary,
After S3ood left yesterday I sat with Fa6ma to figure out what she'll do next,
"Are you staying?" I asked,
"I don't know, ya3ny S3ood makes sense bs madry. Nooro ma 3ad feeny energy, I can't fight anymore"
"Then don't, he's not fighting you anymore, he proposed Fa6oom"
"This is not the way I hoped he would propose, a7es he's doing it because he thinks this is what he should do, not what he wants to do, you know? Madry.. I don't know.. it's not the same.. he's not the same and I'm not either"
"But you still love him right?"
"Of course I do.. but it just feels so difficult, there's so much sadness so much history.."
"Maybe you do need to talk to him.."
"I don't know.. I'm confused.. I was getting used to not having him in my life.. I thought I was ok, you know? But now everything is confusing."
"How about I call him and we all sit together, you know, to figure things out. No yelling, no screaming and no judgement, like you're both getting to know each other for the first time"
"Like a first date?" she giggled,
"Heheh yes, like a first date, so yallah, goomy wash your face, get dressed and I'll go get him"
I pushed her towards her room and ran out of the flat to get 3abdallah.
I reached their flat in 2 minutes, S3ood opened the door, he gave me one of his devastating smiles,
"Hey.. you're here. Come in, how's Fa6oom?"
"Madry, but she has agreed to sit with 3abdallah, which is good right?"
"Akeed, yallah come tell him"
I walked into the living room and found 3abdallah sitting on the sofa, lost in his own world, I put my hand on his shoulder,
"3abdallah"
He looked at me and tried to smile, "hey.."
"She wants to see you" I could see his face lighting up,
"Really? You're not forcing her?"
"No, hehe you know Fa6oom, no one can force her"
"When?"
"Now, yallah come" I said pulling him from his arm, we walked downstairs quietly, when we reached the flat he looked at me,
"are you sure? I don't want to push her"
"Yes yallah come in"
We walked in to find Fa6ma pacing the living room, as soon as we walked in she looked up at 3abdallah and stared at him, they both stood staring at each other for a few seconds,
"Umm I'll leave you guys alone" I said,
"La please stay," said Fa6ma looking at me,
"It's ok Noor" said 3abdallah, he walked closer to her,
"I'm sorry, for everything" he whispered and pulled her to him, holding her in his arms, while she quietly sobbed, "shhhh it's ok, it's ok, we're starting over, everything will be ok, you don't have to give me an answer now, take your time, just let us be together," he whispered and kissed her head,
"What if you leave again? I can't handle it again 3abdallah, you don't know what happened, you don't understand" she said shaking her head and pulling away from him,
"I do, wallah I do, I went through the same, please, give me a chance, give us a chance, I promise you I'll be here, I'm not going anywhere.. I love you, I always will, no matter what happens, and I know you love me too, I can feel it, I will never let you suffer again, I'll never let go of you.."
That was beautiful, he kept holding her for an hour, just holding her and stroking her hair, until her sobs stopped and she slept in his arms.
I hope this works out for them.
Until next time..

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