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Hello, My name is.. (10)

Dear Diary,
What to do.. what to do? I'm confused. Today was.. hmm.. epic.
I woke up with a smile on my face, I had a feeling that today was going to be good. Last night after a 5 hour discussion with the girls, which mainly consisted of me describing what could only be named our 'first date', I described every word, every smile, every gesture and we all concluded that it was a successful first date. Does that mean that he likes me? Well, the girls all seem to think so.
I was extra carefull dressing up, he seems to like my hair so I let it down again, brushed on some mascara and blusher and finally applied my pink lipgloss. The weather also seemed to reflect my mood, the sun was shining even though it was cold. I skipped down the street to the tube station, and took the tube to uni.
As soon as I walked in through the gates I saw Dana, ya raby.. not a good start. With the same smile on my face I looked at her and nodded.
"Noor!" oh shit. She wants to talk to me.
I stopped walking and stood waiting for her to come to me, well she's the one who wants to talk.
"I need to talk to you.." she looked worried, was Ahmed ok?
"Is everything ok?"
"Umm yeah I just need to talk to you.."
"Oh.. well I'm late for class, so.."
"Oh can I see you after? I'll wait here" she said pointing at the cafeteria,
"hmm ok I guess.."
I went to class thinking of Dana, she wasn't her usual fake self. Is there something wrong?
The hour and half of class passed really slowly. God the lecturer wouldn't stop! As soon as the class was over I picked up my books and rushed to the cafeteria. Dana was already there, sitting at a corner table on her own, holding a coffee cup between her hands, lost in thought.
"Umm hi Dana, sorry te2a5art 3alaich"
"No not at all.. please sit.."
"Is everything ok?"
"What is it?"
"It's Ahmed.."
"Shfeeh feh shay? I didn't see him today"
"Yeah he doesn't have class today.. well neither do I but I needed to talk to you and I figured it was better to talk to you here away from everything"
"Ahmed is my fiance Noor"
"Oh.. but he didn't.."
"I know he didn't tell you.. well that's because we're not technically engaged.. but we've been together for so long.. it is just the next natural step.. we're just waiting for graduation so we can tell our parents.. not that they're not expecting it.. hehe.."
I felt my world crashing around me.. It's so weird, I mean I hardly know the guy but I just had this huge sense of loss. It's good that I'm not the emotional type so I controlled my expression, I don't want her to see how devistated I was.
"Oh.. mabrook I guess. I didn't know, Ahmed told me you guys were highschool friends"
"Yeah he wants it to be a secret, you know to protect my reputation"
"Really? That's weird I thought that by making it official he would protect your reputation"
"Ha? La i meant him saying that we're friends.. ya3ny he doesn't want to say that we're together" That didn't really make sense to me, but I was beyond caring. I was heartbroken.
"So is that what you want to talk to me about?"
"Why? I mean, good for you and all, bs ya3ny.. why would you want to tell me when it's such a secret?" She wants to see me heartbroken. The bitch.
"I saw how you look at him. He's mine. Back off."
WTF!! I picked up my books and stood up,
"I won't even answer that.. you're such a paranoid person!" I turned my back to her and felt my legs trembling as I walked away.
I quickly sent Juju a message telling her and the girls to meet me at home. I needed to talk about this and I needed my friends to make me feel better ASAP!
It took me around half an hour to get home because of the usual London traffic, 5 minutes after I walked in my friends piled in one after the other. We all sat in my tiny living room and I briefed them on what happened with Dana.
"That BITCH!"
"Manoor! Not that I didn't think of the same word.. bs ya3ny.." I said giggling at Muneera's reaction.
"9ij 9ij Nooro, ya3ny I'm sure she's lying.. just like she lied about the 'vintage chloe'" hmm.. 3aysha's making sense.
"Yes but what if she's not.. You'll only get your heartbroken!" Juju..
"Bala heartbroken bala ba6ee5! Have fun with him, if he wants to marry that bitch in the end then hay gadra!" Noureya..
For once, my friends couldn't agree and I didn't know what to think. At that moment my phone vibrated. 1 New Message. From him.
Hi, I really had fun yesterday. I'm sorry I had to rush bs kint mwa3ed ilshabab. Can I see you today?
"Guys he wants to see me"
"GO!" all of them together.. this they agree on. So I texted Ahmed and we agreed on meeting at a small Italian place close by.
I reached there an hour later, not knowing how I will react when I see him. If what Dana has said was true then he's a disgusting person, then again.. he never said he liked me.. I was only hoping that he did.. but why would he lie and tell me that she wasn't his girlfriend.. well she wasn't.. she was his fiance.. shit this is complicated.
I walked in and he was already there. Ya raby 3alaih!! He was wearing a loose fit sweater but it was still stretched a bit on his broad shoulders. He smiled when he saw me and I felt my heart skip a beat. This will be tough.
"Hi Noora, have a seat"
"Oh hi. I'm hungry"
"Yeah me too, they say the pizza here is the best"
"Umm ok.." 5 minutes later we ordered, and he started chatting about the gym and his trainer, I listened to him, but it was obvious that I wasn't really with him. I was thinking of Dana. Did she know that her 'fiance' was with me?
"What's wrong Noora?"
"My name is Noor" I snapped at him. I saw his smile fading as he frowned and touched me hand,
"Are you ok? Noora I told you I call you that because.."
"Yeah I know.. tdale3ny.. thank you ma abeek tdale3ny" What the hellllll is wrong with me, I was mentally kicking myself.. what if she was lying? I saw him cringing,
"I'm sorry Noor. I didn't mean to offend you in anyway" he quickly pulled his hand off mine, for some reason I suddenly felt cold and a shiver went down my spine.
"Did I do anything wrong? I thought that.." he really looked confused,
"Listen I don't want to cause problems for you with Dana.. she told me you guys were practically engaged and.."
"WHAT???" he yelled, and half the restaurant turned around to stare,
"Shh.. A7med.." I said looking down at my plate, not wanting to see the other people.
"Did she say that? Or did you deduce it from something she said?" His jaw was clenched. Shit he was pissed,
"She said it.." I whispered,
"Tell me everything.." and so I did. I couldn't look him in the eye as I was speaking, but as soon as I was done I looked up and was shocked when I saw his face.
He was really angry.
"Listen I'm sorry.."
"You're not the one who should be sorry, I'm sorry I put you through this" he said, now holding my hand with both his hands.. can he feel my quickening pulse? Fesheela if he can!
"Dana was my classmate, not even my friend. She was actually my ex-girlfriend's best friend. When we broke up, my ex and I we remained friends, it was a mutual understanding, we simply fell out of love, but for some reason Dana clung on to me, well she was always there when Jana and I were together, but I always thought that it was because she was her best friend. After high school Dana came to London, and I was here so Jana asked me to take care of her. That's it. We're not even friends, I don't even see her that much outside uni, unless she calls and tells me she's coming then I can't say no. I can't believe she said that.. If you don't believe me I'll give you Fahad's number, he's my friend and he was in our class in highschool he knows everything.."
"A7med you don't owe me any explainations, ya3ny if you guys are together.."
"How can I be with her when I'm falling in love with you Noora? Can I call you Noora now?"
Hehe enough said..
Until next time..